Yunalesca Sakura

 I'm terrible hungover and trying to kill some time before I have to go to work and I found this...

www.wikihow.com/Look-Like-a-Twilight-Vampire

Its so funny. I can't believe someone or more than one someone actually made this up. ITS SO LONG! AND STOOOPID! Why won't they stfu about the walking/running?!

My favourite however is this one:

Twilight vampires don't hesitate often, as they have very good accents and speak very well. However, Edward does a bit of hesitating in the movie you can notice he says um, err. Effect. This is only because he is nervous around Bella. For a full effect of a twilight vampire don't hesitate often.

Yes, because your accent dictates how fucking articulate you are! *facepalm*

I see I'm not the only one to be drive-by friended by twihard_fan (no doubt a troll, but funny!troll is funny), but did you notice they happen to have a community in which they've set posting as open to anyone. I'm not criminal, but I couldn't resist this crime of opportunity waiting to happen, so I've posted a link to my contra fic crossover. Let's see what happens...

http://community.livejournal.com/twilightlovex3/5004.html

Title: "Red Moon (Akatsuki)"

Author: Matrix Refugee

Rating: PG-13 for now, will go up to R for extreme violence and sexual content featuring questionable consent in later chapters

Pairing (if applicable): mild touches of Tsuzuki/Hisoka and Muraki/Tsuzuki, but not really integral to the plot; non-graphic Muraki/Edward, with questionable consent since a certain wannabe-vampire is under a psychic fog.

Genre: Supernatural/Horror crossover (with Twilight)

Chapter (if applicable): Chapter Three of a projected four

Comments: This is the edited version of the chapter; I'll be posted the more graphic version (linked to my personal LJ, since I've found that M-rated fics seem to get less traffic on ff.n, plus LJ has the LJ-cut feature which allows one to veil mature content behind a warning or two, both before the cut and in the cut-text) in a day or two: I wanted to get this posted sooner, but work and Christmas shopping interfered. Also, I had to exercise a lot of restraint in keeping this under a PG-13 rating.

Actual Fic: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5544033/3/Red_Moon_Akatsuki

FMAB, the episode was better than the last few since there wasn't many forced jokes.
InuYasha was good, with Kanna dying and all. I liked how they gave her a shade of emotion, a satisfying episode.
I've been watching The Familiar of Zero by request, and wow, is it bad. Seriously, just...I knew it would be bad when I watched the first episode, since I saw that it had flat out stolen from my popular works like Harry Potter, Haruhi, Pokemon, Ouran High School Host Club, ect, no creativity, and the creativity it has sucks, no one in the damn show is likable or writen like any type of real person.
I've bought the 6th HP movie, finally! I didn't watch it yet, but I did watch the deleted scenes, why the hell did they leave out the part with the choir and the castle getting all shady? It was an epic scene! Pfft, whatever.

Oh, man....this is WORTH the hours of inane chatter I have to suffer through on TheTwilightsaga. Seriously, this cracked me up. I found it on the profile page of a particularly annoying twi-twit. It is epic in it's hilariousness.

Ahem...may I present to you...(drumroll please)

THE TWILIGHT OATH

~Twilight Oath~
I promise to remember Bella
Each time I carelessly fall down
And I promise to remember Edward
When ever I'm out of town
I promise to obey traffic laws
For Charlie's sake of course
And I promise to remember
Jacob When my heart fills with remorse
I promise to remember Carlisle
When ever I am in the Emergency Room
And I promise to remember Emmett
Every time there's a huge boom
I promise to to remember Rosalie
When ever I see something that holds pure beauty
And I promise to remember Alice
When I'm at a mall and a cute outfit spots me
I promise to remember Renesmee
When I see that beautiful bronze hair.
And I promise to remember Esme
When someone tells me they care
I promise to remember Jasper
Whenever my stomach isn't curled
And I promise to remember the Volturi
When someone speaks of dominating the world
Yes I promise to love Twilight
Wherever I may go
So that all may see my obsession Because
I know what the Twilighters know

Bolding mine.  I can totally see dozens of insane fans kneeeling by their bedside and reciting this every night.  Oh, man, I don't know whether to laugh or cry.

EDIT:  I am going to consolidate all of the parody verses you guys have written into a new Twilight Oath: The Lost Verses

Post your contributions in the comments!

Hurrah! I got a video done for all of you before the holidays. This is a video about Edward Cullen's stalker attitude towards Bella, using the song "Charlene (I'm Right Behind You)" by Stephen and the Colberts from The Colbert Report. Rated PG for creepy Edward.

( Video under the cut )

Perhaps it's a bit assuming of me, but given the fact that you are on this site, most of you would be feminists or at least support the general idea, no?

I've been calling myself that for a couple of years now, but I'm still discovering what it truly means to be one. Just denying the "man" his proverbial sandwich? Demanding equal pay? There's gotta be more.

One of my role models, however fictional, was Maude Lebowsky. I just love the way she approaches life and language. It might sound stupid admitting this, but that movie DID teach me that a woman should not be more embarrassed when talking about her vagina than a man talking about his penis. Away with society's double standards!

While thinking about sex roles, I remembered watching a movie called Red Sonja. Many people consider it a bad movie (it does have cheesy dialogue) but I really like because it was the first movie to truly show a WARRIOR woman, complete with armour and sword.

I tried to compare this movie to Twatlight (because that thing has become my standard of anti-feminism) and I realized that despite all their differences in terms of plot and acting, they were similar in being a bit anti-women. Even if Red Sonja is strong and independent, she dresses like a slut and ulitmately depends on Lord Kalidor Arnold to help her. Am I over-reacting or does Hollywood truly think that there is no such thing as the completely independent woman? At least in Red Sonja she does not completely depend on him, or fall for him as soon as they meet. :p

stepstomarrow
When granddaughter, Jada, was born with leukemia, a donor-match was located and Jada made a miraculous recovery. In honor of her grandaughter's health, Jeanna has decided to walk across the country (in the dead of winter) to raise awareness and build support for the bone marrow registry (all that's required is a cheek swab). Follow Jeanna's remarkable journey as she travels the United States by foot.

Autocomplete Me is a site that shows some of the weird and hilarious suggestions Google gives when you type something.

Well, this may be their magnum opus--The Twilight Saga as told by Autocomplete Me.

The last result is baffling yet hilarious.

Hot off my MySpace activity feed: Robert & Kristen are candidates for 2009's 'People Who Matter' awards. Needless to say, I voted them as 'Least Important'. You can too! There's a little slider on the page: Source link is sourceish.

Also, I know it's been said many a time, but how is this sexy?
 
Massive face is massive. And that rapeface is in no way desirable. D8<

Most watched videos on Youtube:

1. Susan Boyle - Britain's Got Talent (120+ millions)
2. David After Dentist (37+ millions)
3. JK Wedding Entrance Dance (33+ millions)
4. New Moon Movie Trailer (31+ millions)
5. Evian Roller Babies (27+ millions)

Um... yeah, humanity has officially lost it.

((Apologies if this has been posted buuut... ))





<3,
We, the Anti Twilighters

For some reason a couple times in the middle-ish the video jumps a bit....and I have no idea why as it only happened in the upload to YouTube. *shrug*

New level of ridic here. I was looking up baby name websites. I go to the page for "Charles"

( and I get this )

( Twilight panties?! )

I'm speechless. Really.

(Sorry if it's already posted before)

Hi there! I'm a long-time lurker and first time poster here. I need some extra information as to what people regard as the worst attributes of the 'New Moon' movie.

I'm asking because I said (in a scathing, meant-to-be-a-sarcastic-remark way) that I'd write a review of the movie for the school newspaper. Unfortunatly, my newpaper leader took it as literal...

I already have down the acting and the overall lack of plot. Is there anything else about the movie that Just Bugs You?

Thanks! I'd be much appreciative for the extra info. =)

-Spel

What did you read this week?
I read more Japanese myths. It's exam time, so you know, have to focus on that. FMA chapter 102, was a hell of a thing, anyway.

It's been a couple days, so I will spam you with another TwiJab, probably the most terrifying yet.

I have a special one I'm sanding for X-mas day :) In the meantime! Enjoy...

It's been a while since I made an AMV. In fact, I haven't made one since back in the summer- before my computer crashed and the memory had to be swiped. Anywho, just recently I got the initiative to rip my Princess Tutu episodes for new video files. :) And, viola, I made this! The song is "The Plagues" from The Prince of Egypt. I apologize if it's not up-to-par, my AMV skills are bit rusty (from what I had built up that is).

From back when I loved Twilight, I, of course, friended the offical Twilight MySpaz page. Now that I'm no longer a fan, I considered deleting them from my list, but the opportunity for lulz was a far greater influence on me. And, occasionally, the 'friend', now named "The Twilight Saga: New Moon" (it is not a saga, damnit!) pops up on my activity stream with some new lulz. Today, it was this: The Baltimore Sun

( However, the comments were of more interest to me... )